Hit By The "Special" Bus

I wanted to share a little story about me, my car, and a “special” bus.  Yesterday on my way to work it was a pretty uneventful ride.  It was until I was almost to work.  I was sitting at a stop light waiting to turn left.  Now this road usually has two lanes, one to turn left and one to turn right.  Now by usually, I mean it does until you have big-ass snowbanks on either side of the road.  If you have a skinny, tiny car, like a mini-cooper or a Prius you should be fine, anything bigger and you are not going to fit.  With that being said, there I sat waiting for the light to turn, when I glance in my rear-view mirror and see a “special” bus.  You know what I mean, the short bus.  So I see the bus try to pass the line of cars on the right hand side, and I”m thinking, “yea right, never gonna make it.”  But yet she tries, and just as she is passing me, “BAAAAMMMMM!” and my whole car jerks to the right!  “Son of a bitch, she hit my car!!”  So I lay on the horn and she just keeps on driving like nothing happened.  At this point I am livid!  I cannot believe that she can smash into my car and keep driving!  So when the light turns green I go after her!  I am so angry, getting angrier by the second.  Luckily I know where the school is and I go around the block and pull up right behind her!  I park right behind her, jump out of my car, go stomping over to her window in my 3 inch heels, and bang on her window with my fist!  I can feel my heart pounding, I am so angry at how stupid this woman is!  She rolls the window down, and I go all “crazy white girl” on her!  “Do you know that you just slammed into my car back there at the light???”  “um, no, I’m sorry I didn’t notice“,  “WHAT!  How could you NOT notice hitting my car?? There was a LOUD BANG, and my car was pushed over to the right, what is wrong with you?  And then you drive off????”  “oh, sorry I didn’t mean to”  At this point my head spun around, and pea soup came out of my mouth, yes I went all “Linda Blair in the Exorcist” on the “special bus driver”.  I stomp off to go look at the damage that has been done to my car by the big bus that slammed into the side of me!  She follows me and we stare……..and we stare some more…….wow, I can’t believe what I am seeing here!  And I know she is thinking the same thing…….WTH!!!

“Where the hell is the damage???”  I did not look at my car before I went psychotic on the bus driver, apparently my car is soooo old it is still made out of metal (this is why it has so much rust), because there was NOT one single dent, scrap, mark etc, on my stinking car!!!!  So knowing that I now look like a very crazy, lunatic I say the following to her, “You are sooo lucky there isn’t any damage to my car!!  You need to be more careful driving that thing!”  And I got in my rusty, 19 year old tank, that must have an invisible force field around it, and drove to work….