Roller Skating Queen…NOT

Last night was “skate night” at our local roller skating rink to raise money for the boys school.  This is always a fun event because it’s private with only parents, teachers, and children from the school.  It’s a fun family event.  Last night I invited Willow from work which was good because then I had someone to skate with.  My boys once they have those skates on are gone!  Let me start off by saying that I have no coordination, I’m very clumsy and if I start laughing, forget about it. 

 The first pair of skates I put on felt like my legs were going away from each other, kinda like Goofy on roller skates!  I traded those for another pair, although I think the woman behind the counter really thought it was just me, and not that the skates needed an alignment!  These skates I swear are the same ones they have had there since I was in 6th grade!  Which for those of you that don’t know, that would be 22 years ago.  They are ugly brown, brown laces, and bright orange wheels.  Very retro.

Willow was great, of course!  Everyone I seem to go with skates like they just came out of a roller derby movie.  Me on the other hand, well I’m a different story.  I can stay upright, most of the time.  I kinda look like Frankenstein, if he were to take up skating!  I can’t turn very well at all.  Stopping is the absolute worst thing for me to do, I prefer to grab the wall or something, because if I try to use that round thing at the front of the skate to make me stop, well I would be injured.  I tried it once and I stopped immediately, way too fast, jerked myself forward, landed on my stomach and slid across the rink.  So, I’m not gonna try that again!  It makes for a really good laugh for everyone else though.  I did fall last night, although it wasn’t my fault, it was some kids fault!  The problem with it being a family skate night is there are soooo many tiny children!  And they all bunch up together, and when one falls, they all fall!  It’s like dominoes!  Well, one kid fell in front of Willow and I, and then a second later it was a 5 kid pile-up!  Of course not being able to stop or turn fast, I did the only thing I could do…I went, “AHHHHHHHHHHH!”did some little jump thing (can’t even explain that one), had arms flailing everywhere, legs every which way and fell on the floor.  I think Willow enjoyed it!  It was very slow motion falling, looking like a spaz!  But I didn’t run over any children!

Of course today, I can’t walk, way too sore!  This is my body yelling at me saying, “why do you do things like that, don’t you know better by now?”

This entry was posted in crazy crap, Family, Fun, oops and tagged , , , , , , . Bookmark the permalink.

2 Responses to Roller Skating Queen…NOT

  1. mrsbear says:

    I haven’t put on a pair of roller skates in years! I’d be terrified. Fall when you’re old hurts so much worse than when you’re a springy kid. I took my daughter ice skating a couple of years back, got on the ice and did pretty well for a good hour and a half. At some point I lost my balance and fell on my ass hard, I thought for sure I’d ruptured my spleen, everything inside me felt out of whack. It’s good at least you were trying.

  2. The Little Big Sister says:

    You should try roller blades next time. For the life of me I can NOT figure out roller skates, but you put the little wheels all in a row and off I go. I don’t know why, it just is easier.

Comments are closed.