Screw You Mercury!
Okay, even though it sounds like it, I won’t be ranting the entire time, and at some point I promise to be funny, (thanks to Wendy & her ordeal). First off to explain the title. Maybe it hasn’t happened to you, but lately my life has been, well, a little upside down. A few people at work were complaining about crappy things happening with their spouses, machines, computers, etc, and our office astrology guru, we’ll call her “Miss Cleo” to protect her identity. For those of you that don’t know Miss Cleo was the Jamaican psychic hot-line lady that got sued for being a fraud. I guess she didn’t see that coming! So, “Miss Cleo”tells us that Mercury is in retrograde right now, which basically causes crappy stuff to happen, fights with those that you love, and just all around bad juju. Now, personally I don’t really buy into the whole, “the universe is greater than me” thing. Just ask Elle, she’ll tell you. I do however buy into the “My Name is Earl”karma thing, even though I know that’s a made up t.v. show. But since things have been pretty messed up lately, I’m starting to be a believer. We’ve also had computer problems at work…more than usual. And then “it” happened. The sh crap really hit the fan! The receptionist went around and told all of us that Wendy (the girl I went to the redneck club with), was STUCK IN A CARWASH! Yes folks, you read correctly, stuck in a car-wash! I couldn’t stop laughing, and when Wendy was finally freed from the well car-wash and she had to keep telling the story, I laughed each time I heard it! I warned her, I’ve warned everyone, that once you tell me something, you run the risk of me blogging about it to the entire world wide web! Apparently Wendy drove into one of those touch-less car-washes, which are also attendant-less. The wash started, soaped up her car, and then the hydraulics went. The thing is, when they died, the sprayer was stuck around where she would open her doors, so she couldn’t open her doors. I could just imagine her faced pressed up against the window trying to yell for help. Ha ha ha (sorry Wendy). A car pulled up behind her and waited for her to finish. I’m betting at first the woman was thinking, “what the hell is with this girl, she had to get the mega super wash or something, when is she going to be done!” Then the woman drove away, and Wendy was thinking she was a goner for sure. But the woman came around and yelled to her, “don’t worry, I’ve called for help to save you” Which is a good thing because poor Wendy was getting claustrophobic at this time. A nice grey haired man came, asked how her day was going, which, um HELLO?? STUCK IN A CARWASH!! and got her out. He even let her go back through for free so she could wash all the frozen soap off of her car. Wasn’t that so nice of him? We all think she should of gotten something more for being stuck in there for 30 minutes. And guess what, her car still looks dirty.
So good luck to all of you during this time of chaos. According to “Miss Cleo”, things will be back to normal after the 30th….if we can all last until then. I for one will not be going into any enclosed spaces where machines are in control. Wasn’t that a Stephen King movie????
