Twice in the last week I’ve had to talk to a person with crazy eyes. You know what I mean. They’ve got one eye that looks straight ahead and the other one drifts off to the side. I never know where I’m supposed to look. Do I look at the straight eye or try to look at the drifting one?\u00a0The\u00a0whole time\u00a0they’re talking to me and I’m supposed to be listening these other thoughts are racing through my mind.<\/p>\n
me: Where do I look?<\/em><\/p>\n person: Blah blah blah<\/p>\n me: Do they even know how distracting that is?<\/em><\/p>\n person: Blah blah blah<\/p>\n me: Maybe one of them is a glass eye<\/em><\/p>\n person: Blah blah blah<\/p>\n me: Didn’t Sammy Davis Jr have a glass eye?<\/em><\/p>\n person: Blah blah blah<\/p>\n me: I think Sandy Duncan did too.<\/em><\/p>\n person: Blah blah blah<\/p>\n me: Didn’t she do one of those Scooby-Doo cartoons? I think there was a monkey in it.<\/em><\/p>\n person: Blah blah blah<\/p>\n me: Funny, lots of stars did those Scooby-Doo cartoons. The Three Stooges, Sonny & Cher, Dick Van Dyke, Don Knotts<\/em><\/p>\n person: Blah blah blah<\/p>\n me: Jonathan Winters, The Harlem Globetrotters, The Adams Family………………….<\/em><\/p>\n person: Blah blah blah<\/p>\n You get the idea. Oh, and if you have a glass eye or crazy eyes, no offense.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":" Twice in the last week I’ve had to talk to a person with crazy eyes. You know what I mean. They’ve got one eye that looks straight ahead and the other one drifts off to the side. I never know where I’m supposed to look.…<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":3,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"__cvm_playback_settings":[],"__cvm_video_id":"","spay_email":"","jetpack_publicize_message":""},"categories":[9],"tags":[193,712,1418,1419,1449],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"","jetpack_publicize_connections":[],"jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"jetpack_shortlink":"https:\/\/wp.me\/p3ISGQ-p3","jetpack_likes_enabled":true,"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.bluemonkeybutt.com\/home\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1553"}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.bluemonkeybutt.com\/home\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.bluemonkeybutt.com\/home\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.bluemonkeybutt.com\/home\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/3"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.bluemonkeybutt.com\/home\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=1553"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/www.bluemonkeybutt.com\/home\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1553\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.bluemonkeybutt.com\/home\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=1553"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.bluemonkeybutt.com\/home\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=1553"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.bluemonkeybutt.com\/home\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=1553"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}