Did I Say Bribe? I Think I Did

If it’s Tuesday, this must be Random Tuesday Thoughts. It’s brought to you by Keely at The Un-Mom. She really knows how to rock Tuesdays so go and check her out and tell her the Blue Monkey Butt sisters sent you.

Elle

I have two pretty pathetic goals this week. One is to get all of laundry sitting in a pile in my basement. I don’t know how it gets so big because I do laundry almost every single freakin’ day. Usually, more than one load, but there’s still more down there in the laundry room waiting for me, calling my name saying “wash me, wash me” It’s pretty creepy actually. I figure if I throw it out there maybe somebody will come back next Tuesday and call me on it. I know I can count on Stacy to bring it up.

My other goal is to try to save more money by using coupons. You see these women on TV or in a magazine who swear they buy like $200 worth of groceries for $9.35. I don’t see how they can possible do that. I go through the coupons in the Sunday paper, but so many of them are for crap we just don’t buy or the coupon is for .25 cents if you buy 2 huge bags of dog food. Also, those women can’t be buying fresh produce or meat. I’ve never seen a coupon for a leg of lamb or a pineapple. Not that we eat lambs. They’re on my list of meats that come from animals that are too cute to eat. Things like bunnies, deer, panda bears, stuff like that. Then there’s the list of animals too gross to eat. That would be like frogs, squirrels, rats, stuff like that. I’m going to put a little more effort into saving money on groceries. I’m thinking it’s going to be too much of a hassle, but if I save enough I’ll keep it up. I’ll let you know how it goes.

We made our first batch of Halloween cookies Sunday. It’s a recipe I’ve been using for 16 years that I found in a Mickey Mouse Magazine.  J-man had one this morning after breakfast and said “You make the best cookies!” I admit it, I really do make the best cookies, try not to be too jealous. See, I love to bake but hate to cook. I really truly hate cooking dinner every night. You go through all the effort, everyone eats it in like 10 minutes. You’re lucky to get a “That was good”. Usually it’s more like “What’s that?” or “Do I like that?”. Then there’s all the mess to put away. Baking is better because everyone loves what you make, plus it usually makes enough to last a few days. What’s even better is that baked goods are great for bribes, like, pick up the family room and you can have a cookie. It works way better than say, pick up the family room and you can have some tuna casserole. (for the record, I’ve never, ever served tuna casserole to my family)

Stacy

Wow, that’s going to be a tough act to follow, Elle must of took her extra strength sarcasm pill tonight!  Here goes, somebody needs to think up a new way to remove leg hair.  There is no good way to remove it, and it’s a pain in the ass to do!  Have you ever cut yourself shaving?  Wait, what am I asking, if you’re a woman, I’m sure you have…anyways, why is it that you bleed like you’ve been attacked by Norman Bates in Psycho??  I mean, the whole bottom of the tub is filled with blood, just like in the movie.  And it could be the smallest cut on your leg, but you would think you hit a freakin’ artery!

I should not go grocery shopping on Sunday’s.  I should not go grocery shopping to Wal-mart and Market Basket on Sunday’s.  The problem is not me, but the fact that everybody goes shopping on that day, and I hate people!  Okay, maybe the problem is a little me.  By the time I am done shopping I am ready to have a psychotic episode.  The other day I had both boys with me, something that I never ever do, but had to this time.  Well, I became that mother, you know the one that will yell at her kids no matter who’s around…that was me!  I was seriously thinking that if they didn’t stop annoying me and each other I was going to be leaving them at Wal-mart.  Don’t worry people I didn’t, lucky for them they believed me when I said that I was going to take away all electronic devices for a year.  (yea right like I could last that long without them playing video games!)

What’s up with the guys wearing skinny jeans?  I’m sorry, no offense, but they don’t look good on any guy!  I find myself almost going up to these guys and letting them know how stupid they look, kinda like how Stacy and Clinton do in What Not To Wear.  That would be great to be able to go up to someone and tell them how bad they really look.  Of course they are buying these people a whole new wardrobe, but still….

And Donny Osmond is just creepy….he’s on Dancing With the Stars this season and he just creeps me out, I’m just saying.