Did Somebody Say Spaghetti? WTH?
Stacy
Last week I had a big WHAT THE HELL moment! WARNING–If you are squeamish about creepy, crawly, yucky things, STOP reading! The following post is DISGUSTING! If you just ate, don’t read it. If you’re about to eat, don’t read it.
Well, you know even though you read the warning, you’re now intrigued and you have to know the gruesome details, even though you know it’s going to make you go, “EWWWWWWWWWWWW!” Okay, here goes, the puppy is still having accidents now and then, and last week she pooped in the house. Well, when I went to clean it up I noticed it looked like she ate spaghetti. Since I know I didn’t feed her spaghetti, and we’ve been really good about keeping everything above 4 feet now, I didn’t think that she got into something. I looked at it again and it moved! What the Hell??? What the Hell is that? I immediately started freaking out. I assumed she had worms. Really gross spaghetti worms! After cleaning it up, we ran up to the Pet Store and I texted Elle, because let’s face it, she knows everything. (just don’t tell her that, even though she already knows that she knows everything.) She said it sounded like worms, but to Google it. I was hoping for the diagnosis, cure and complete info about it, but I guess she was busy. It turns out she had roundworms, not spaghetti worms. We got her some medicine that was suppose to treat it immediately. Well, it did about 2 hours later. I had been watching her because I knew she would have to go to the bathroom, but the little shit she snuck away from me and hid in the hallway. That’s when I heard it…….it……the yucky sound of her going to the bathroom on the hallway rug. Okay, the noises weren’t even the worst of it! What I saw will haunt me FOREVER. I can never eat spaghetti again. And probably neither will you. There was a GINORMOUS pile of poop that was MOVING! Yeah, picture a stinky, pile of poo, with tons of spaghetti trying to move across your floor. WHAT THE FREAKING HELL?? What kind of crazy Stephen King crap (literally) am I dealing with here??? Those pills worked great, she had probably pooped out every last worm, and there I am in shock, I think I may have been screaming and crying, staring at this pile trying to figure out what to do. How do I grab a bag, paper towels, bleach, face mask, gas mask, hazmat suit, rubber gloves and goggles??? And of course the puppy is wondering why her giant pile of poop is moving! She wants to go check it out. Are you kidding me right now?? Somehow I grabbed what I needed and cleaned it up, swearing, crying, and complaining the whole time. Funny thing is, for days she didn’t have an accident in the house again, I think I freaked her out a bit. Which is good, because she totally freaked me out….and you.
Elle
Hey Stacy, how about coming over for dinner? We’re having spaghetti.
Okay, how the hell am I supposed to follow that? Clearly nothing I’ve got to complain about even comes close to that horror. Not that I’m complaining. I’m sure it’s much easier to read about it than it was to actually have to clean it up.
Most mornings my husband drives Sissy to school. This morning he had to drop off his car at the shop and one of his coworkers was going to pick him up from there and go to work. Last night we gave Sissy the option of taking the bus or getting a ride. He was very clear that he would need to leave at 6:40. She was fine with that and that’s what we planned. This morning my husband got up and knocked on her door and said “I want to leave a little earlier if you can be ready”. WTH??!! Just last night it was 6:40 and now at 6:20 you are telling a teenage girl she has less time to be ready?? He does this all the time! Gives us a time and then changes it when it’s almost time to leave. No! You can’t do that! It was 6:38 and she wasn’t out yet and he said “I’ve got to go.” Really? Just give her those 2 minutes. He did and she came out and they left. I get that he didn’t want to leave his co-worker waiting, but we did agree on a time to be ready. At least give her that time. Don’t change it at the last minute then if she can’t make it, leave early. Plus, then I would’ve had to drive her. Ain’t nobody got time for that!
Don’t forget about that spaghetti dinner Stacy!
